Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Virgin Myths: Virgins are Frigid

Cherry graphic via
I realized I haven't popped a myth since January. Y'all, that was so long ago! My apologies!

As a reminder, my intent with my series on virgin myths is to challenge preconceived notions regarding virginity. Thus far, all the myths I've tackled are stereotypes I've faced in my own life, or in the case of my post on male virgins, a stereotype I myself held. (I know. Feminist fail).

But what isn't true for this feisty francophone virgin could totally be true for another virgin. Just remember.

Virgins are people too.

So, that said, let's talk about those cold bitches who won't put out! Bro.

Myth: Virgins are uninterested in sex. Virgins are frigid. Virgins lack affection.

Confession: I think about sex All. The. Fucking. Time.

There is a highly inaccurate assertion that men think about sex every seven seconds. Highly inaccurate.

I can't claim to have ever attempted a study on myself, but I think about sex during appropriate times (making out with the boyfriend, watching a documentary on the porn industry, debating the problem of prude/slut shaming) and during highly inappropriate times (tuning out my pastor's sermon, driving to pick up the kids from school, watching Glee).

I know I'm a virgin. I know I've committed to saving myself for marriage. I know that I thoroughly enjoy the non-sex sex in which the boyfriend and I partake. I mean, geez, I have an entire blog devoted to the topic of virginity.

But sometimes I just want to fuck it all and jump the boyfriend and figure out what all the fuss is about because it sounds really really fun.

I'm totally not frigid. When I'm with the boyfriend, once my clothes come off, they only come back on if we're forced to deal with other people. Hell, in Niagara Falls, we ordered pizza delivery for dinner, and I just stayed in bed naked while the boyfriend went to the door. I like making out. I like being naked. Me, frigid? Hell no.

Affection goes beyond sex. For me, affection is kissing the head of Amy,* doing my secret handshake with Sam,* and dancing around the house with Annie.* Affection is hugging all my best friends constantly, letting my brothers destroy my cute hair as they play with it, and holding the boyfriend's hand at any given point in time. I have never lacked in affection.

In summary, being a virgin does NOT mean I am uninterested in sex, frigid, or lacking in affection.


*Fake names, duh, of the three kids who I call my own. I'm just their au pair, though, not their mother. :)


  1. "But sometimes I just want to fuck it all and jump the boyfriend and figure out what all the fuss is about because it sounds really really fun."

    I felt like that when dating my husband! We would make out and I would be like, uh, sex now? And he would laugh and say no :P Super fun! Sometimes we go back to that place just to prolong the climax :P

  2. I totally agree with this post and just fell in love with your blog. Lol. Everything you say is so real and unscripted (if that makes sense...lol....). Subscribing now. <3

    xo, Sarah
    Hustla, baby.

  3. i always heard that virgins were scared and shy of sex. that it's a taboo thing to them. not at all, as you've wonderfully proven.


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